twerkforphan:

sammylostshoe:

I need this for reasons.

No but think about it. Right before sleeping you have an awesome idea for a fanfiction: Just write it on your bed sheets! And the next morning when your mom wakes you up you’re covered in porn.

^^^^^^^

coulombs-flaw:

nihilarian-u:

staysandstories:

vintage-aerith:

wallflora:

SOMEONE MADE A LEGIT PHOTOSET OF THIS HELP ME

Here it is

Whose Line Is It Anyway: Irish Drinking Song Game

(Source: jellineck)

nothisiscarlie:

“Harry witnessed Professor McGonagall walking right past Peeves, who was determinedly loosening a crystal chandelier, and could have sworn he heard her tell the poltergeist out of the corner of her mouth, ‘It unscrews the other way.’”

#this is why the books are better

(Source: gallifreyfalls)

supsquark:

why the fuck is there so much stigma surrounding going to the movies by yourself why the fuck do you need someone to help you sit in the dark and look at a wall for two hours “oh look at that dork they don’t even have a friend to ignore for the entire duration of this event”

turkey-imported-from-maine:

firelorcl:

meladoodle:

i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed

a dentist

i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police

schrodingersnerd:

everythingisnightvale:

discontentramblings:

An asexual and pansexual become room-mates and have wacky adventures

The show is called ‘All or Nothing’

Plot twist: the asexual is really super outgoing and is a huge flirt while the pansexual is extremely socially awkward and has trouble ordering coffee let alone getting a date.

image

my hand slipped

tom-marvolo-dildo:

madilee23:

skeletonflight:

AU The Fault In Our Stars where Hazel Grace succumbs to the cancer and dies and in the last scene all you see is Augustus standing out side with a cigarette between his lips and a hand slowly reaching up to light it.

HOW ABOUT NO

WOW I DIDNT KNOW SOMETHING COULD BE WORSE THAN THE ACTUAL ENDING NOPE BYE

jamesfkinborer:

Whenever someone insults my music taste when they listen to chart music

jamesfkinborer:

Whenever someone insults my music taste when they listen to chart music

danteogodofsoup:

Excellent storytelling

(Source: exclusivelylouisck)

sk8n8:

compasswaters:

100% of people who tell you you’re too sensitive are saying it because they don’t want to be held responsible for your reaction when they mistreat you

Yup

 

 

ffffjjjj:

I love Wayne Brady lmao

(Source: bloodyoathmate)

dancing-to-your-heartbeat:

Showing up at your best friends house uninvited.

dancing-to-your-heartbeat:

Showing up at your best friends house uninvited.

(Source: smallfucks)

kyssthis16:

negritaaa:

youngmarxist:

So if we have to show women what the baby looks like in their womb and tell them how the process works before allowing them to get an abortion, does that mean we should teach our soldiers about the culture of the lands we’re invading, and explain to them that the people we want them to kill have families and feel pain, just like Americans?

yooooooo